How crazy will the debate between Harris and Trump really be?

After the political parties hold their conventions, the next big date on the election calendar is September 10, the only scheduled debate between Donald Trump and Kamala Harris. If it happens, which is not certain. Not since the days of Ross and Rachel has there been such a convenient “will they or won’t they?” First it was on. Then it was off. Then it was on again. Now Trump is grumbling about the microphone situation and even hinting that he wants out of it altogether.

The Great Debate has grown in importance since the Trump-Joe Biden meeting cost Gampy Joe his chance at a second term. Trump was certainly on top form afterward, but Biden’s withdrawal had nothing to do with Trump’s performance and everything to do with the fact that he looked throughout the entire performance as if he had just woken up on a planet whose name he did not know.

Now, with a new candidate at the top of the list, a candidate who has so far seemed immune to Trump’s stupid nicknames (Kamabla???) or his stupid insults (She turned black???), Trump is in trouble and on the defensive. His best chance to turn around a campaign that seems to be stalling would, of course, be the debate stage. So why is he acting so – and yes, I will use the word –strange about it?

Some say he is afraid. Senator Elizabeth Warren told MSNBC’s Jen Psaki: “The felon is afraid of the prosecutor – and for a damn good reason.” On CNN, Trump’s former adviser Alyssa Farah Griffin said she believes Trump’s reticence has to do with the fact that he may have to face difficult questions: “There are things he has to answer for in this debate … and I think he’s afraid of that.” On Bill Maher’s show, CNN moderator Kaitlin Collins said: “I think Trump is really nervous about [the debate]… I spoke to many sources close to him … he was really struggling with how to fight them.”

Republicans, in turn, claim Harris is afraid of the debate, although she has given no indication that she plans to withdraw from the meeting. Sean Hannity of Fox News said: “[Harris] is obviously afraid to debate Trump,” and then referred to the fact that she had rejected Trump’s proposal for a debate on his network, saying it would be “too risky” and that she was “too incompetent” to visit the land of fairness and balance.

The Conservative Washington Examiner published the headline: “Kamala Harris is afraid of a debate with Trump, and that’s a good thing.” It continues: I’ll be honest: I didn’t read the whole article because, you know, Washington Examiner.

So who is afraid of whom? I guess Trump probably Is nervous about debating Harris. After all, she is younger, smarter, and wiser. Plus, her hair is much thicker than his. But I don’t think he will actually drop out of the debate for several reasons.

First, he’s terrified of being perceived as weak. Second, he knows he’s slipping in the polls and needs to make up ground. Third – and this is the reason I’m most convinced he won’t back down – he just enjoys being on TV. The guy’s a whore.

For her part, I think Harris is probably not comfortable debating Trump either, for the simple reason that his superpower is unpredictability. He thinks nothing of cobbling things together from the thinnest of fabrics. This week, for example, he claimed that Harris “allowed” 325,000 children to be “smuggled into our country,” adding that “many of those children are now sex slaves or dead.”

Too bad his friend Jeffrey Epstein is no longer around to help Trump find some of these kids. Debating Trump is like debating a chimpanzee holding a handful of shit. You know he’s going to throw it. You just don’t know where it’s going to land.

While I don’t want to make too many predictions, I think when the Kamala Harris who gave her acceptance speech at the DNC last week shows up, she will clean up Dirty Don. She was focused, energetic, and well-spoken. She looked presidential.

Unlike speeches, however, debates are not scripted affairs. One wrong word, one twisted fact, one fly landing on your head. None of that matters to Trump. His supporters expect neither eloquence nor facts.

Harris will have different expectations. She must be precise and deal directly with the Shrek-like creature who will no doubt be buzzing around, interrupting, and displaying all the ogre behavior we all know and hate. America needs to see the current vice president stand up to the former president – and not just make her point, but stick to his. In other words, she must be brilliant. He just needs to stay awake.

Presidential debates are strange campaign digressions. They probably no longer have the utility of helping voters compare and contrast candidates on their policy views. Their utility is now much closer to that of YouTube.

Debates are opportunities for candidates to DESTROY, DOMINATE, and DECIMATE. That’s why Trump manages to survive them. Not because he has anything of substance to say, but because he knows the more outrageous he behaves, the more likely he is to create that viral moment that could inspire the next ear tampon or JD Vance semen cup.

My best guess is that whether the microphones stay on the whole time or are muted when the candidate’s opponent speaks, Trump will do all the things Trump does. We’ve seen them, they’re boring. Far more interesting will be Harris’ performance. How will she handle his petulance, his interruptions, his lies? Will she rise high when he falls low? Or will she reach out and grab him by the tail? I hope she does. She’s a star now, and when you’re a star, they just let you do it.